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Sacrifice for My Family

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Life is about acceptance and once I accepted what I need to go for my family, I am OK now.

My family is going through a really rough time right now and I feel so guilty. We all have to file for bankruptcy and I feel like if I had never left my abusive husband 8 years ago and moved back home my family would be in a better place, at least financially. They spent their all their money dry to help me.

So yesterday after meeting with the attorney I decided the best thing for me to do is to sell my car (which is paid off) to help with the daily and monthly expenses for my family as well as attorney costs and to help make repairs on the house. I have not been able to get a job or go back to school because my depression has been so bad, so my doctor wants me to file for disability. I don't care about the money for myself, just taking care of my 80 year old great-aunt and my mom.

So even though right now I am putting my life on hold to help them, I feel it is the least I can do after all the sacrifices they have done for me. I am so thankful for my family. I would not be here without them. I just wish I could go back in time and change the situation so they would be in a better place right now. But I can’t, so I need to focus on what I CAN do!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    All I can say is you are in my thoughts and prayers. Whether you all have had to file bankruptcy they love you. Most of all because you found the strenght within yourself to leave an abusive relationship while you are still alive you are a SURVIVOR! ((((((((((( Tara))))))))))) Hang in there. I have been in your position of kinda. Just take one day at a time!
    3816 days ago
  • SAMI199
    I am so sorry-I am praying for all of you! Hang in there-I have through some similar things-it is hard now-but it will get better! Believe that,ok.

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3816 days ago
    focusing on what you can do is good. my prayers are with your family.
    3817 days ago
    Taking care of each other is what family is all about. They were there for you and you will be there for them. I am so sorry you are going through this and have added your family to my prayers. We were in a situation where we had to consider bankruptcy but became incredibly frugal and were able to pull out. It is hard.
    Take care of your health!

    3817 days ago
  • SILLYHP1953
    You are going through, and have gone through, a really hard time. I've been in abusive relationships, too, and am glad you got out of it. I try to not give advise, to just share my experience, strength, and hope. I've learned how very, very important it is to forgive yourself and let go of the past. I believe a lot of my depression in my earlier years was directly related to not being able to forgive...myself and others, but mostly myself. Have you read The Spark? It has a whole chapter devoted to depression, how exercise helps and can even heal it. I'm glad you shared your pain with us, because I know that helps, too. Keep sharing. Be willing to heal.
    emoticon Phyllis
    3818 days ago
    If you could keep your car and find work then that would be a good solution but if you are not feeling well enough then claiming disability will be a start...ask if you can have the payments backdated...its worth a try!

    Don't blame yourself for your mum and aunt becoming bankrupt...this must have been going on for some time and they should have indicated this to you. You are NOT responsible for somebody elses misfortune!

    I understand they have been there for you and you love them and want to help but going bankrupt could have consequences for them and you must be in a strong position to be able to help them.

    I hope you don't beat yourself up over this and stay strong!

    3818 days ago
    If it were my daughter who was in your situation eight years ago, it would not have been a sacrifice to help her out. It would have been called love. It was a "do what you've got to do" situation. And now it's your turn. I'm so glad you can make these decisions with love and gratitude as your primary emotions. Bless you and bless your family.
    3818 days ago
  • SUNNY332
    Bless your heart. I feel so bad for you. We all make sacrifices and you are making a big one for your family.

    Praying God's Blessings for you my friend.

    3818 days ago

    I'm sorry to hear that you're having such a hard time right now, Tara. I don't know you're family, but I'd wager that they'd rather be bankrupt with you than trying to get over the loss of you at the hands of an idiot.

    You're doing an incredible job with the Fun & Hope team. And with each other's support, you'll all get through this part as well.

    Peace be with you. emoticon
    3818 days ago
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