JWPWIFE

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She doesn't get it...

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

So my family was at the Country Club for lunch on Sunday - for MY birthday- and everything was going fine. I was wearing a brown empire waist dress with a ribbon around the waist (this matters, I promise). After a semi-sensible lunch, I was at the dessert buffet with my fiance, my brother and my mom. I grabbed a salad bowl/plate for dessert instead of the little flat dessert plates and said to my mom (I WAS BEING TOTALLY HONEST) "Don't worry, I'm not gonna get more, I just don't like eating ice cream off of plates". At that point, she turned to me and said "Well you're wearing a loose fitting dress and you look like you've already started filling it out" and then she poked at my stomach and walked away laughing. I'm sorry. I don't know if it is just me, but I don't want ANYONE poking/touching/pointing at my belly. Especially my freaking OCD about eating mother who criticizes every bite I take. I honestly almost started to cry right there in the dining room. I also almost punched her. I realize that I am not 125lbs like her (even after having 3 kids blah blah blah), but I guess it hurt a little more than usual because I had even just TOLD HER the DAY BEFORE that I had lost 5 pounds and was really feeling good about it. I got about 1/3 a cup of ice cream (to which she later commented "Oh good, you didn't fill up the bowl") and waited until I got in the car with Joe to cry, but it's like, will she ever NOT be embarassed of me?
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • SHARONA_P
    Sometimes the people closest to us have NO idea how much of am impact one comment can make, especially when it's something someone is sensatove about. how hurtful. I hope you have been able to say something to her since. Sometimes the best way to combat things like that is to state the obvious at the moment it is said and response with an equally casual "ouch, that was hurtful" Some people can be so clueless and hurtful without thinking. I'm sorry that you have that added challenge to face. Having to deal with other people's comments is certainly not the most fun part of working towards becoming more healthy. Just remember that you know you are making progress and effecting change in your life and other people care and support you in this, even if others do not!
    4736 days ago
  • KERI_RIEHLE
    Several months late on the comment, but I just wanted to say I know how you feel. I've always had a struggle w/ my weight. At one point I was borderline anorexic and I blame a lot of it on my mother. I constantly had to hear "are you sure you need that?" everytime I ate something that was a tad bit fattening or sugary. Even when I was tiny!!!! I actually started to rebel and stuffed my face just to piss her off. (A lot of good that did me huh??!!)
    5045 days ago
  • KIPNUS
    Wow, that really hurts. I'm sorry you had to go through that. Have you talked to your mom about how she makes you feel?
    5211 days ago
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