an early valentines day gift
Monday, February 13, 2012
i'm giving myself an early valentine. a new life free of judgement and condemnation. god is healing my heart and i don't need my husband to validate that. god himself is my valentine this year. i praise him for giving me the courage to create a new life and ask for his strength and support as i pursue that. he is a good god, he knows my heart, my husband doesn't.
i will buy myself roses to sit on my new dining room table in my new apartment. god is doing a new thing, so watch out, here's comes the real me. full of faith, fire and life.
i knew this was a year of discovery and actualizing my true self. what i didn't know was that i was going to have to make a clean break in order to that. the last fifteen years weren't wasted or lost. we together (my husband and i) brought two gorgeous, bright, beautiful human beings made in the image of god. perhaps that was our primary goal, to make beautiful people. i couldn't have predicted that my husband and i would find ourselves no longer connected, attached, good for each other. but we made some good stuff in our fifteen years together.
thanks, everyone, for listening. i am so excited about my new life. if you pray, pray that my husband will accept that this is the right thing and will not be contentious in our divorce.
i am grateful for my sparkfriends. you are a key part of my support system. i also have my church, friends who love me deeply and support me.
life is good. god is good.