Slowly but surely, I'm finding my way along again.
Saturday and Sunday we spent in the yard and garden. It was glorious here with the sun shining and warmer weather. The puppies had free reign to run in and out of the house at will - all summer long the door is open for them to rampage around the backyard whenever they wish, then come charging into the house like a panting pack of ragamuffins, sloppily lap down some water, then go zooming off again. It makes my heart smile to watch them bound around the yard with such joy chasing bugs, each other, or anything they think they might have heard.
I managed some nice calorie burns and step counts those two days, blowing my 'calories to be burned for the week' out of the water with one mega-burn day on Sunday. It felt good to get out and soak up the Vitamin D while moving and stretching and sinking my fingers and concentration into the dirt.
What I didn't manage was a run with the Tribe on Saturday. They did a 10 mi run that I just was not up for or ready for. I let it go, and contented myself with happily gardening with Bill and the puppies. Last year, I missed so much of this - working the yard, taking care of plants and living things - I think this year will be a time to bring things all back into balance again, making time for everything, somehow.
Bill's recovery is still going well. It sounds so cliche but I believe this turn of events alerted us not only to his health issues, but brought home a few salient points about our relationship as well. I'm hesitant to say it directly (because when I say something positive, something negative almost always follows in direction opposition to the positive) but it feels like we both have a better appreciation for each other, and what we have. We have been so very far apart for quite a long time, it's a little hard to trust 'us' right now. But I am, I'm making every effort to, and it's making a world of difference.
I ran for the first time in .. hang on... yep, the first time in 2 1/2 weeks. March 24. Whew. It was not an easy 2.5 miles. Not at all. But it was enlightening. Why? Because I got my sign.
Bumps. Seems pretty simple. It's a yellow sign, indicating it's a warming. It's warning you that there are bumps ahead. It's telling you to slow down.
It doesn't say STOP!
It doesn't say TURN BACK!
It doesn't say GIVE UP ALL HOPE!
It say be careful, there are bumps ahead, as there are in everyone's lives, and you need to slow down a bit, but you can keep moving. Just use caution until you're clear of the bumps, and then you can proceed as normal again.
Well, no. I'm not trying.
I'm walking at lunch. I'm eating better. I'm sleeping better. I've been to the gym, and will go again this evening. I've run. I'll do it again Thursday. I've asked my Tribe leader for advice on how to handle my training, or lack thereof, for the R'n'R. I am doing, and while I find myself achy, sore, tired, and still a little raw, I am making progress.