Monday, May 14, 2012
I feel like I have none...I stare at the Jillian Michaels DVD, shes taunting me.."Hey, fat ass, get up and do something no excuses!" And I just don't..I want to just sit here and eat junk and watch sappy movies..depression sets in yet again and I hate it. I hate feeling sorry for myself..
~I chose to marry someone who I thought I loved but in all actuality I was in love with the fact that someone gave me attention and actually wanted to be with me
~I chose to have children with said person knowing full well I shouldn't have and even though I love my children dearly I would never regret having them
~I chose to divorce this man after spending 10 years married to him..giving him multiple chances to change himself because I knew I could never change him myself.
~Leaving knowing I had no money, no job(at the time), and no outlook in life.
I am trying so hard to not be a Debbie Downer but as I am lacking in exercise my jeans are getting tighter and my energy getting lower. I guess what I'm asking for is help which I hate asking for but dammit being rock bottom is not where I want to be anymore.