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Disbelief & Being Melancholy

Thursday, December 06, 2012

I'm being a little melancholy tonight. We have a local facebook page for buying and selling items and I have had it in the back of my mind to get a few things ready, pictures taken, prices set, etc to list on that page. So tonight I went down stairs to pull out of storage bins some old clothes that no longer fit. I knew what they were, but I didn't realize the emotions they would bring up to the surface. They've been in storage for 3 years, ever since I lost the majority of my weight. When I pulled the top off of the bins, memories of wearing those clothes (most of them 10 - 12 sizes larger than what I wear now), being that weight, came flooding back. Some actually good memories (my youngest daughter and I had matching sweaters at one point and I found mine), but most of them just of disbelief. Disbelief that I had been that size. Disbelief that I took it off and kept it off (notice I didn't try to get rid of them until now, being the cautious person who doesn't want to have to repurchase clothes if I need that size again) for almost 3 years. Disbelief that I had been THAT person, because unless the memories are jarred, I don't REALLY remember it. I don't ever think about the pain in my knees that I had when I tried to squat down to pull clothes out of the washer & dryer, or not having the strength to open the living room window, or not being comfortable sitting in a car, or not being able to be comfortable in a winter coat after it's buttoned. Sorry if this brings anyone down, just a lot of memories came back tonight.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • no profile photo CD12293198
    Sounds about right to me! Looking back can sometimes be painful but looking back for you, although painful, also liberated you to be able to put that time in your life behind you FOREVER! Congratulations!
    3077 days ago
  • no profile photo CD5645667
    Hi Laurie !!.
    On the contrary it shows hope and inspires us as to what can be done ... Congratulations my dear ..
    I know it is not as easy as everyone thinks, to lose all that weight ..
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3077 days ago
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