1-99 SparkPoints 1

I DON'T understand myself!

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Okay, I have to come clean. I really, really don't get myself and why I do the things I do. This morning I'm doing a happy dance cause I weighed in at 144.2 just a few more ounces and I'm back to 143! YAY ME! Okay so what happened to feeling so darn good and I could take on the world?

Kiersten had a doctor's appointment and next door to her doctor's office is this little bitty diner place...West Side Diner...awesome place...if you are not watching what you eat. Its been probably 2 1/2 to 3 yrs since we've been there. Its just Kiersten and I, the other 2 kids are at the neighbors house. I say lets go out for a little treat. We swing into the Diner and I ordered us one of their famous milkshakes....WHY? do I do that? I first said we would share one, then the waitress said well we have kid size cups...okay go ahead and do that....WHAT? I go from feeling so good about being so close to a weight that I havne' been at in awhile, to we'll share a shake, to okay you have your own and mom will have her huge one to herself!!!

I ate about 1/2 I could NOT eat anymore and I probaly could of stopped at 1/4 of it but kept going. I can only imagine what the numbers on this thing would be...Black Forrest Chocolate shake, lets not forget the whipped topping that was on top...okay I had a few bites of that and pushed the rest of it off...whipped topping was a little too much to handle.

I want to be mad at myself, but I'm actually not. I'm brushing it off as if its nothing! I have downed a bottle of water since walking into the that is going to matter much, bu..t whatever.

I slipped on a pair of jeans this morning tha thave been so snug in the private areas and I felt like I was on cloud nine this the pants are snug around the waist UGH!! I think the rain has let up and I just may dig out my bike and get the girls out for a bike ride while Johnathon is at soccer practice. Girls don't have practice, coach called it off due to all the rain. Johnathon's team though will practice in just about any type of weater...they are older and they are boys..
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Don't beat yourself up. We are do it. My sister who is in AA told me I should treat my being over weigh like an addiction. When you feel that feeling of blowing it-just tell yourself -if this was alcohol would I want to do this. I know this may sound extreme but food is an addiction but unlike alcohol and drugs-we need it as a source of fuel to survive. I find that when I tell myself this. especially when out to dinner w/ my husband or with friends-my mind tells me ... to take it easy. Good Luck!

    PS: Don't worry-I have myself tried on pants in the morning that fix and by the end of the day-I can barely zipper them up!!
    5202 days ago
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