RESERVED1948

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Learning to love myself

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

I understand now that it is not that "no one wants me", it is that I do not want me. it took me six months to realize that all the feedback I received was correct and I could have saved myself some agony had I "run" to begin with. After a while one gets tired of being a jackass. I realize that I look for love from people who are not in condition to give it. Yes, indeed, I am desparate. I have deep seated roots of rejection in my life because my alcholoic parents left me in the street to fend for myself when I was just four. My brothers stole and brought me sugary donuts to eat. But we survived and in spite of the Dickinsonian beginning to my life, I am still alive and flourishing. I know I have God's love and truthfully what could be greater than that. I am so sad because I had to sensibly get away from yet another abusive relationship even though it was mental and emotional abuse. I owe it to myself to be more careful who I love but we all know that the heart wants what the heart wants. My emotional eating has gotten me nowhere and yes, I more than likely need professional help. But from whence cometh my strength, "My strength cometh from the Lord". I like the expression that I read lately that says we never really lose, we just learn lessons. I suppose the lesson to be learned here is that I must love myself too much to put up with any kind of abuse. It is time to stand up for myself.
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  • IGNITEME101
    Yes!! It's a lesson I've learned, also! emoticon emoticon
    2182 days ago
  • no profile photo CD1951302
    One thing that I discovered in my counseling sessions was that many times those who have been abused either seek it out again OR they start abusing others. It is a difficult problem to resolve completely.
    2190 days ago
  • JENNY888
    You might find some advice in my series of blogs I have been doing on a webinar by Dr. Furhman on Overcoming Food Addiction. You are an over comer. You can do it. You just need to decide to do it. With the help of God you will.
    2190 days ago
  • RHOOK20047
    When things for me get too heavy, I take time and talk with the Lord. I tell HIm that this is more than I can handle, and ask His help in carrying this burden. You have made this realization and I am sure it has hurt through the dark days of your life, but learn to love yourself, and others in turn will love and appreciate you for the great person that you are. You can do it. You have passed other trials. Put your problems in His hands and let Him lead you through them. You can do it! I will offer a prayer for you!
    2190 days ago
  • JENSTRESS
    It is a hard lesson to learn, but God loves you more than you will ever know. As much as you love ANYONE, God loves you more than that. It was hard for me, to even grasp that God loves me like I love my daughter, only even MORE. So I want to treat His creation like He would.
    2190 days ago
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