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i'm a binge eater?

Thursday, March 26, 2015

while attempting to buy a house a few years ago i found out i was an emotional eater. while waiting to find out if our offer was accepted i would feel so stressed and just kept eating. i realized what i was doing and went for a walk. it was the first time i realized i was an emotional eater. i have noticed more since then that i do eat when i'm feeling extreme emotions (or boredom). i have also realized that i tend to drink more when i'm stressed too. emotional drinker?
i've been trying to deal with these feelings doing everything they say to do: go for a walk, find a hobby, talk to someone, wait ten minutes, etc. nothing works! then i get more and more depressed because i just can't quit eating. i sneak food, i closet eat, i make really lame excuses to drink. and every single time i feel like i'm out of control. i feel guilty, i want to cry, i promise myself i'll start over tomorrow. and then the same thing happens tomorrow. the past two weeks have been real bad. we're trying to get out of debt and it's been a very stressful week trying to come up with some funds "overnight". so i've been eating out of control. like i have $5 to waste on junkfood?! then i messed up my knee and i've been on light duty the past week with one more week to go before seeing the dr again. it's been depressing. i feel as though i'll never lose weight and get healthy if i can't use my knee properly. i can't even do a freaking squat right now! i know my being overweight and out of shape probably hasn't helped the situation (though what i have happens to people of all ages and especially athletes in full contact sports). that realization makes me feel even more depressed and frustrated and then i just keep eating.
yesterday i received an email from webmd about binge eating. i read the article out of general interest rather than personal reasons. it was a slideshow that explained different things about binge eating. the second or third slide stopped me in my tracks. omg! that's me!

here is one example of binge eating disorder(BED) from bedaonline.com:
"Binge eating disorder is characterized by recurring episodes of binge eating, feeling out of control while binging, and feeling guilt and shame afterward."

before yesterday i thought binge eating was when you sat around eating chips or twinkies uncontrollably. like you ate the whole box or bag yourself. i have never done this. i have never uncontrollably eaten a container of ice cream. apparently it's not:
"A “binge” can vary widely in amount of food consumed and duration of time spent consuming it. While it might mean a considerable amount for some, it can mean a smaller amount for others. Regardless of the amount of food eaten, the person still feels out of control to stop, with distress following the episode."

here are some characteristics that fit for me:
Recurrent episodes of binge eating occurring at least once a week for three months
Eating a larger amount of food than normal during a short time frame (any two-hour period)
Lack of control over eating during the binge episode (feeling you can’t stop eating or control what or how much you are eating)

Binge eating episodes are associated with three or more of the following:
Eating large amounts of food when not physically hungry
Eating alone out of embarrassment over quantity eaten
Feeling disgusted, depressed, ashamed, or guilty after overeating

i'm still researching this and have not been clinically diagnosed or anything, but i think it's a great start for what i'm currently struggling with. it's another answer in my continuing quest to find out why i'm overweight. i've been eating like this for years and i've never known why. maybe this is why?
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • PRNCSCUP1-2FULL
    I remind you that I am a Licensed Professional counselor. BDD may be your issue and it is a serious issue, however I have to say that it is not why you binge eat. It is a manifestation of your behavior, not the cause. I read you saying that nothing works to stop a binge, but I want to point out that you do have limits and something has worked. Many times with any addictions we have to go thru the painful emotions to get out of the unwanted behaviors. I suggest you start working with your emotions with journaling or some other way in order to put an end to the drinking and the eating. The 10 part guide SP has for emotional eating is great and if you truly work the suggestions they work! I wish you success! I, myself, always want a reason why and sometimes the why is not as important as digging in and putting what we learned into true and practiced action! Wishing you success!
    2243 days ago
  • no profile photo CD6550047
    Oh my gosh I have started doing this too!!! its like I just can't get enough to eat.. there is really nothing wrong with me outside of the fact that I can't exercise like I want and that is depressing.. mine is a hip!! it is true that most exercises have some kind of leg movement and when that is impossible it kind of stops us in our tracks.. I have decided to have the most beautiful arms and back around...LOL

    I also have noticed that on the days I do my arm exercises that I don't binge eat either!! maybe there is a connection with us not being able to follow our 'Plan' than makes us so uncontrollably hungry.
    2244 days ago
  • GIPPER1961
    Keep researching. The more you understand it and how you react to the stressors the better the chance you have of beating it one day at a time. Long time binge eater here. Just when I think I have it beat something pops up and I choose to get sucked in. Good luck to you.
    2244 days ago
  • BEMILLER30
    I can definitely relate to this. I agree that seeing a counselor is great for depression. Or just talking to someone you can trust. I've been there. We also go to marriage counseling once a month.

    I hope that things get better for you. We are also getting out of debt, and we will be debt free by August if things continue to go our way. We use Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University. Once we started throwing every bit of extra money we had at our debt it started to dwindle faster and faster. Hang in there because it will be so worth it! We also give ourselves an allowance to spend on whatever we want, so we don't feel too restricted.

    I think that it's all connected. When I am depressed, I don't want to do anything. Which makes me want to sit around and eat. Which makes me feel worse. Then I feel bad and guilty for eating. And the cycle continues in a downward spiral.
    So dealing with the depression can make those other things better.

    I also know exactly what it's like to not be able to exercise. I broke my leg a few years ago and couldn't do anything. During recovery I was ok. I gave myself a break mentally. Let my leg heal. It was after that was the hardest for me. I had to do physical therapy. Then basically had to start over again with exercising. It was tough. Looking back on it, I wish I had handled that part better emotionally. I've also had running injuries before....when that happened I had to find other exercises to do and be ok with that!

    I can't offer much help, just that I understand what you're gong through.

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    2244 days ago
  • JUDITHBEAST
    I would look into a counselor for dealing with stress. There's nothing wrong with it, I've seen one before on several occasions and end up feeling better about things. A counselor may be able to help with the binge eating and depression. Hope everything gets better.
    2244 days ago
  • no profile photo CD11091430
    Have you tried chewing gum when you get stressed and have the urge to eat? That helped me a lot when I first started. I can't anymore because I have jaw problems but it was a good way for me satisfy that urge to eat. Don't give up. You can do it!
    2244 days ago
  • 50YEARSAWIFE
    thanks for the education on binge eating.
    2244 days ago
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