EM4488
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I am so beat down

Wednesday, September 02, 2015

This year has been the most turmoiltouous year I have ever have. I am exhausted by everything in my life. And everything just keeps piling and buring me deeper and deeper. I'm at nearly 250 pounds now. I feel like total and complete crap - inside and out. I hate everything. I'm back tracking in spark. 2500 calorie days- but honestly doing better than normal thanks to my plexus. It's really curbed my snacking. But I am still lazy and do virtually no exercise. I hate who I have become. I hate every single aspect of my life. I would like to say I need support and motivation, but even that doesn't seem to rouse me. I wish this could be easy.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • AJDOVER1
    You are dearly loved and you are not alone.
    Life is not easy. Reach out and share the journey.
    Take care of yourself.
    emoticon
    1880 days ago
  • CARTOONB
    Sounds like you are going through a rough patch. Have you thought about seeing a professional who can help you get out of your funk? Nothing will change until something changes. (Stupid saying, huh?)
    1881 days ago
  • MIMULUSBUG
    Well. you are not alone! There are so many Spark peeps that know exactly what you are talking about; So hang in there, don't give up! Forgive yourself & start loving yourself and put on your Scarlet - Gone with the wind hat & repeat after me:
    Tomorrow is another day! Tomorrow is another day!.

    Then erase all your crappy choices from yesterday and beyond, and get down and do something groovy fun! I like to put my FUNKGASIM or RYTHM NATION album on and DANCE MY BOOTY OFF until I'm exhausted or giglling.

    my 2 cents

    1882 days ago
  • ROUNDTOWNMOM
    I have been where you are. I am not exactly the same person, and I don't have a magic wand that fixed everything for me. Remember: YOU are the only person who can control your reaction to things. You have to start somewhere for YOUR situation to change. The first place you start is truly taking a look at the person you are and finding something that you LIKE. You hate where you are and you hate who you've become.................if your best friend was telling you that right this very minute.....what would you tell HER / HIM??? Would you continue to tell them how horrible they are? How lazy they are?? Or would you find the *positives* in them, give them encouragement, and help them figure out a way to turn things around?? I finally figured out for ME that I had to treat *myself* as I would treat my best friend. Be honest with yourself, but not cruel. Be patient and kind with yourself but be firm with YOU as you would be that friend. You have to first learn to find the things you love about that lady in the mirror...... you may not *like* where that lady in the mirror is at this point..........but you are pretty much stuck with her. She is loveable and you have to learn to love her in the midst of your disliking her at the moment. Only when you start to focus on the **POSITIVES** you find can you start to move ahead.

    Take this journey one step at a time. Trying to look at the whole big picture is very, very overwhelming.......................
    ............... and remember that, here, you are NOT alone.

    You can do this. YOU are worth it. Do NOT give up. emoticon
    1882 days ago
  • KENDRACARROLL
    Oh, I'm so sorry you're in a funk. Life sure isn't easy, but don't give up. There is always something worth fighting for. Time to take stock and identify what's getting you down and then start digging out, one scoop at a time.
    Keep coming here, it'll help get you back on track.
    emoticon emoticon
    1883 days ago
  • ZMICHE
    Sorry to hear you are going through a rough time. This journey sure isn't easy! I have learned that self care is so important. It's a process, it's going to take time to get back on track. It's okay to take time to evaluate what is going on in your life and make changes at your own pace! No need to beat yourself up over it, other people do so much of that for us already. Hang in there, one day at a time.

    emoticon emoticon
    1883 days ago
  • SUE0318
    Just do one thing today towards that healthier lifestyle - just walk ten minutes or have a piece of fruit instead of a cookie. Unfortunately, it really is 'slow and steady wins the race'.
    1883 days ago
  • BARCELONAME
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1883 days ago
  • SUSANELAINE1956
    You are overwhelmed now, but you can do this. Start with a few changes, not trying to do it all at once. Take it a day at a time. I was also up to 250 when I started to really get serious. I could give you support and tips if you like. Leave a message on my page if you would like to talk more. emoticon emoticon
    1883 days ago
  • MAMALOU1942
    Nothing is easy. If you hate everything in your life...do something about it. Get off your derriere and take a step and then another and keep on going. See where your steps take you. You may be surprised.
    Get moving, my friend.

    emoticon
    emoticon
    1883 days ago
  • AJB121299
    nice
    1883 days ago
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.
 

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