100-249 SparkPoints 210

Time for a Change

Monday, March 21, 2016

Hi, I'm Jess, and I have an interesting relationship with food.

It all started with my mom. Before you freak out, I promise I don't believe that my mom caused my weight gain nor do I blame her for it. Let me tell you a story.

I grew up with a smart, beautiful, strong mom, who was unhappy with her weight. She was a size 16-18 and her own emotions about her dress size manifested in the way she harped on my sister and I about food. "Do you really need that?" "You just ate, how can you be hungry again?" and "If you're really hungry, you'll eat an apple or some carrots." Back then, I was really thin. I played three sports in high school and was recruited to play college softball. I ate a ton of food but I could; I was an active, growing teen. When I went away to St. Lawrence University, things began to change.

Without my mom's ever-watching eyes, I could eat whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted and for the first time in my life, I began drinking alcohol. I played softball for a year but then quit so I could sing with the choir instead. My activity level declined but my calorie intake remained the same. Still, I didn't put on the majority of my weight until I graduated.

After graduation, I got a great job that paid pretty well. Now, I could buy WHATEVER food I wanted, and sat on my a$$ eight hours a day, five days a week doing an office job. My new finances combined with the fact that I no longer walked everywhere impacted the scale. Big time.

Fast forward to now: seven years after college graduation. I have Masters degree, a career I love, a husband I love, and an extra seventy pounds. Those pounds are all because I cannot control my portions and snacking. The meals I cook for my husband and I are (for the most part), really healthy. I run 4-5 days a week. Two years ago, I ran I half marathon. The past seven years have been spotted with chunks of time I like to call, "Jess, get your sh!t together." and I do - until I lose enough weight that I think my job is done and then it creeps back because, man, aren't old habits so easy to fall back into?

That's why I am here. I know I need to change my lifestyle and I thought that having the support and motivation of those who are doing it and have done it would help. I hope it does.

I'm ready.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • RHOOK20047
    Welcome to SparkPeople. We are all here for the same reason, no matter what our personal story is. We are here to help each other to get to that healthy point we want to be in our lives. It is not going to be easy, but it is attainable. Make small goals and they will lead to big successes. You have to make you #1 and tell yourself that you are worth it. If you don't take care of yourself you can't take care of anyone else. If you are not doing it yet, start using the food and exercise tracker. Learn what proper portion sizes are and I think you will be amazed. We here in the States eat way too much. Got to any restraurant and you will find that most portion sizes are really twice what a single serving should be. Sound like you are back on track. Keep up the good work. You can do it! We are here to help! Welcome and get active on this site. emoticon
    1917 days ago
    Best of luck!
    1917 days ago
    U can do this
    1917 days ago
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