Sick & Tired of being Sick & Tired.

Wednesday, June 15, 2016

Well this last week has been a rough one. For some reason after losing an EPIC 5.5 pounds after my first week, I fell into a deep depression. I cried over everything, I felt worthless, I wanted to just disappear from life for awhile. Of course this caused my eating to skyrocket and my tracking became non existent. Saturday I woke up feeling better after finding a nice outfit to wear to my husband's cousin's wedding and was feeling really pretty.

Unfortunately our car broke down halfway to the wedding. Thankfully my FIL came to our rescue and helped us get the car fixed. It was the alternator so close to $400.00 later we were back on the road. We made it to the reception and it was nice to see everyone...even if my hair did look like I just was in a wind tunnel! Money has been tight for awhile now so this did not really help the situation and of course I was already pretty down so tears were shed!

Sunday I woke up to news of the Orlando shooting. I have a HS friend who used to manage the nightclub where it happened and even though he is now in Real Estate, he goes back to guest bartend quite a bit. Thankfully he was not there that night and is safe but he lost alot of good friends and it really hit close to home for me.

Needless to say it's been a rough one! But I also have noticed how hard it is for me to just walk around. My knees are aching and my ankles are hurting. I am so tired of being out of breath and outgrowing my clothes. I am not too big for my "FAT" clothes. Something has to give! I just don't know what my problem is! I know what I need to do, I do it for a week or so and then it's like I give up again. Well I am back to it again.

I gained back 3.5 pounds of what I lost last week but am still down 2 pounds and I am going to focus on that to keep me grounded. I can still lose the 25 pounds by the end of the summer..I just have to really work hard and commit. This is a lifelong commitment...and I need to get that through my thick skull! I want my son to learn to be healthy!

Goals for the week:
2. Meal plan!
3. Clean out kitchen cupboards and fridge to make room for new fresh healthy food.
4. Workout 3x

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Good luck
    1801 days ago
    So much going on in your head and heart. I am thinking of you and sending you my prayers of comfort, strength, patience (with yourself), hope and love. When lots of things start to happen or even seem to be happening, it's okay to take a step back and be kind to yourself no matter what you may be doing or what negative things that inner mean girl may be saying to you.

    I love the family pictures you shared, such an adorable family and you have an infectious smile!
    1825 days ago
    That's a lot going on. You have a beautiful family! I'm glad you're feeling better and that your friend was safe. Sorry about the weight gain but you will get it back off again! Keep moving forward!
    1826 days ago
    Glad you made it to the reception! Hang in there! Try not to beat yourself up too much! And a 5 lb loss is a lot for a week, be careful you're not restricting yourself too much. When I try to eat too low carb, my personality and moods change alot even I'm getting enough calories. Slow and steady losses is the way to win! emoticon emoticon
    1829 days ago
    I've been on that wagon too. Feeling worthless depressed yuck!
    So far my challenge hasn't gone well but this week I'm really working on it.
    I want to feel that motivation, happiness and strength again!
    We can do it!!
    1829 days ago
    Shared your concerns at youth group prayer meeting. Praying you do well soon.
    1830 days ago
    This was a rough week. Thinking of you.
    1830 days ago
    Meltdowns and emotional eating happens. Just like life.

    Sweetheart, you are worth the time and effort. What do your measurements say as opposed to the scale?

    The scale is a great tool for showing you your relationship to gravity right at that moment in time and nothing else.

    Your self-worth, what a great Mom and partner you are doesn't come from the scale. It comes from within you.

    Keep doing what it is you need to do.
    1830 days ago
  • no profile photo CD3501043
    Great pics! Hang in there :). You are gorgeous !
    1830 days ago
    beautiful pictures!! I am so glad that everything worked out in the end! So glad your friend was not there that night!! my heart goes out to everyone that was there! Peace!!
    1830 days ago
  • no profile photo CD12525212
    I have been yo-yoing for the last 2 years after losing 60 lbs. I know it gets hard, but as long as you keep trying you are successful.
    1830 days ago
    You can do this! Sending lots of positive energy your way!
    1830 days ago
    I'm glad you made it to the reception and got the car going in. No more crying and depression. Things are on the way up from here!
    1830 days ago
    It is a life long commitment and sometimes that sucks. I think when will it be over. But then I always come back to lifestyle change and realizing that life really is better
    1830 days ago
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