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Blog 8 - The Fat One

Sunday, January 07, 2018

I absolutely love my family. We are very close and I am so thankful for that. My mom is probably my best friend in the world...the first person I would want to tell big news to. Every Sunday night my brother and his family, my sister and her fiance and my family go to my parents for a big Sunday dinner. It is almost always a roast - either chicken or beef - with mashed potatoes and all the fixings.

While my family treats me extremely well, it is still incredibly hard to not feel like the "fat" one. My sister is a size 0 and absolutely beautiful. My brother is one handsome fella, and my MOM is currently wearing my size 8 jeans FROM HIGHSCHOOL!!!!!!! Now, I am not fishing for the "you are beautiful" type comments. In our own way, I truly believe we are all beautiful...God created us and He doesn't make junk. The problem is...I have eaten too much junk and now it shows! It doesn't help that I am also the more reserved and quiet one in the family and I have much less focus on the world's view of success. My brother is a pilot for a major air line. My younger sister is my BOSS and is very active in the business community for her young age. One day she will take over the business completely. That is all by choice though. I was offered the promotion. I was offered the business. I didn't want that life. I want to go to work, do my very best every day, and then leave it all at the office and come home and focus on the things that really matter to me. I am actually quite proud of that choice. But still, sometimes when we are all sitting in a room together though I can't help but feel just a little bit 'less than'. OK philosophical pity party over now!

In reality...I seriously rock. I have been killing it at the gym and making really great choices with my food. Yesterday, I got all the way to the gym (for the second week in a row) and realized that it actually closes at 8pm on weekends! Lesson learned though - I went right after church today and got in my 60 minutes, and that's not including about 20 minutes of stretching and cool down.

Tonight at dinner, while everyone else had plates piled with mashed potatoes smothered with butter and gravy, and yorkshire pudding with...more gravy...I chose to fill most of my plate with roasted carrots and peas. I weighed my beef to make sure I was taking a sensible portion (3oz). Instead of gravy I ate my beef with some pickled beets and skipped the yorkshire pudding and potatoes all together. Yay me :) While everyone else was complaining about being over stuffed, I was pleasantly full without being uncomfortable.

All in all I think today was a great day. I am making good progress and now have 21 days under my belt of consistently logging good food choices.

Bring on the new week!
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