10,000-14,999 SparkPoints 14,500

eating my grief.

Wednesday, January 30, 2019

This is Katie. My Sweet Katie, or Katie Did or Didit. But always a sweetie. She's 14, a humane society baby. She was around 9 weeks when I got her. A round little fluff ball of sweetness.

In September she had a spot on the bottom of her right front front paw that she kept licking. It was a tumor. We had it removed on December the 7th. It's back. And the same size it was when we had it removed. Vet doesn't see Kaite's quality of life being very great in a few months. So she's now on pain pills.

So I'm grieving the loss I will face in a few months.
And I'm eating my grief.
It's not helping.
Six pieces of Dove chocolate hasn't changed anything. My sweet Katie wont be living for much longer.
But I think the chocolate will make me feel better.
It hasn't.

I'm using this as a kind of wake up .... chocolate doesn't heal anything.
Chocolate isn't going to fix it.
I should stop trying to make it go away and acknowledge it's going to happen and just cry.
Let it out.

Eating the chocolate (or whatever) isn't going to change the facts. The ending of a sweet life is still in my very near future.

Katie when she still had her tail. August 2011.

Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • AMYSUE242
    I am so very sorry for your loss! emoticon
    829 days ago
    Awww, so sorry! Prayers for both her and you.
    829 days ago
  • BLB351980
    Prayers for you!
    829 days ago
    Maybe journaling about you alls adventures, the things she does to make you laugh, the words she knows, the tricks she knows, a timeline of her life and events, people that love her, all her details to help celebrate her. Set special dates to do something special for her, like her favorite treats. A special place, a special visitor, anything to continue to celebrate her while you have her. I can not imagine, I have a sassy lil love that is 14years old too. In some ways knowing in advance to properly say goodbye is a blessing. emoticon emoticon
    829 days ago
  • T37533
    Prayers.she was pretty
    829 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.