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Why I am where I am and why it must change

Sunday, September 15, 2019

September 15, 2019--I gained weight during the summer challenge, not a fun place to be. I am motivated to make changes for me. Why? To lose weight, To be healthy, To reduce stress, To be there for my boys, For me time, To get to know like-minded people (joined a 10 week challenge at Fit Body Boot Camp), To look sexy in my bikini, To fit in my size 4s again, To get off zoloft, To learn how to maintain a healthy weight and lifestyle. I love Sparkpeople and it definitely helps me. As I am continuing to learn about my yo-yo dieting cycles, I do better in a group. Part of my reason why I love the 5% Challenges. Could I do all of this just through Sparkpeople, apparently not. I am missing the actual interaction with other women in person. I chose to move away from family, mostly because of their toxicity. However, I find myself getting isolated and not taking the steps I need to make friends here in my country home. My husband is not supportive of me doing challenges outside the house, as he knows it leads to me being tired, cranky, and spending a ton of money. However, I have let the stress of taking care of his mom, the stress of my job send me into a self destructive pattern. I need to be healthy for me and to be able to cope with crazy expectations. I don't want to be the mom who keeps losing her sh*t, failing at work from doing too much, not having enough time to spend with my family. Although I didn't realize it fully, it seems as if all this stress is depressing me. Hoping to truly change for me, so I can be the mom, wife, daughter-in-law I want to be. 
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    HI Teresa!! GREAT blog!! You have a strong spirit and it's easy to see you do NOT want to quit!!

    Please do join us on the STEP Challenge now (found on our AWESOME A Summer Challenge team) and of course in the Fall 5% Challenge on our team. You'll see this way you are not walking a lone. Though we are not of course together in person, I often walk alone because LOL I prefer it!! Why? Gives me the ME TIME I need so badly and I can go as FAST or as SLOW as I wish. When I am upset or anxious, I walk so fast that only 1 friend can keep up with me. Snicker,snicker, fast walking helps me to walk OFF that UGGGHHH ENERGY that comes with STRESS!! It doesn't that fast walking friend, I don't get that. It's always been my GO TO thing.

    Do you journal? It can be done on paper or electronically. When my GD lived with me (well mostly) I'd write it out and if it was something I NEVER wanted seen, I'd just put it thru the shredder!! HUGE help and a most LOVELY invention!!

    Do you have any hobbies? A little ME time is AWESOME!! And if MIL has any that she's capable of,,or if she watches a certain show that you may not be into, it's a great time to do some while still being with her. If she knits, do you live in a cold climate? Even if she's a not so good knitter, etc,,, kids are always losing scarfs, mittens etc, and she'd feel useful again. I have a client who does this, and the JOY she gets from it is simply lovely.
    641 days ago
    Thanks Happy Elf, I need to try a little more of that as well, maybe even just some more prayer time. Patricia, I do walk with one lady in the office at lunch, I live in the country, big distance between neighbors. Most of those don't work full time. Thank you, the couple of ladies I met on Saturday seem like I could get to know them better. Keeping my fingers crossed.
    641 days ago
    There are times in life when we have to stop, plan & prioritize for our own sake. A small group of women interested in walking at the office during lunch time? Or in your neighborhood? You don't have to be super friends, just exercise buddies where you vent out and share your concerns.
    Hope you can build what you need to feel well. emoticon
    641 days ago
    emoticon I am glad that you are able to share the things that are on your heart in a "safe" place. You are correct stress can cause a lot of problems if not handled. I am trying breathing exercises and meditation to help me in my stressful situations. Not for long periods but just a few minutes so I do not feel like I am drowning under the pressure. emoticon
    641 days ago
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