Thursday, April 23, 2020
Okay, I finally admit it. This situation is causing me stress and anxiety and worry and fear. But I'm so much afraid of the virus as I am of the fall out of shutting down our economy for an extended period of time.
For background, I teach dance and Pilates as my job. Those are two things that I can't do during the shut-down. On top of that, my husband and I moved across the country in late October. By the end of the move, I was beginning to experience issues with my gall bladder, although all I knew at the time was that I didn't feel well enough to work. So I delayed finding a job.
I ended up having to have my gall bladder removed mid-February. Then there was the recovery. I felt sick for a long time until I was able to find an adjustment to my diet that didn't have me doubled over in pain and experiencing overwhelming nausea most of the time. All of that has caused us to rack up tens of thousands of dollars in medical bills. Now I feel well enough to work, but I can't do what I'm trained to do, what I feel comfortable doing.
Add to all of that, we have toxic mold growing in our shower and need to have it ripped out and replaced. Talk about an expense! And we're currently having to wait to have it done. Non-essential service and all...
Now for the final kicker that put me over the edge today. We hadn't filed our taxes yet and were super thankful for the extension of the deadline. But I finally was able to sit down and put all the data in. Now I haven't done our taxes in years. My husband has always done them, but he's been working 70+ hour weeks (from home, but still). So I pulled up our account with on website where we do our taxes and began inputting information. I really hope that I missed something because our bill was astronomical. I stopped at the point where it had me review my federal taxes just before paying the bill and I'm going to have my husband double check my work.
I spent the afternoon setting up a care.com account listing myself as a babysitter, pet-sitter, house cleaner, and private lesson instructor (dance, Pilates). And I also spent a lot of time searching local jobs on indeed.com. All that came up were making sales calls for $7.25 / hour (kill me now) or being a cashier or stocking goods at the local grocery stores for the same amount. ($7.25 in the minimum wage here.)
Now all of this is not to gain everyone's pity for me. It's to give one person's snap shot of what is happening in lives all across our country. I know I'm not the only one who's looking at all the money that is owed all over the place, unable to work, and is stressed out because of it.
Here's hoping for brighter days soon.