The Worst Pain I've Ever Felt (SORRY SO LONG)

Thursday, October 01, 2020

I decided to move from Tomah, Wisconsin to a much larger city up north and did so on August 15th with my 16-year-old daughter, Isabel. I desperately needed a new start. So I thought why not? My friend is there. Her kids are there.

Well, on the morning of August 31st, I came in from outside with my dog, Luna. Once my wet foot hit the floor, I fell, doing the splits. One leg was out the door, and the other was inside. The outside door slammed on my ankle. But I didn't feel that pain too much. It was my inner right thigh. once I moved my right leg to meet up with my left leg I was in so much pain that I couldn't move. I've fallen many times before and I always got up, but not this time. The pain was excruciating. I've given birth to 6 children without any pain relief. So I'm not a wimp. I called for my daughter who brought me my cell phone and I proceeded to call 911.

Needless to say, the paramedics tried to roll me onto my back. I screamed and cried, then whimpered. THAT was NOT happening! So I was put into the ambulance on my side from a backboard. That was NOT fun. I kept feeling like I was going to fall off the board onto the ground.

Once at the hospital, they wanted Xrays. I cried so hard with the pain that I was feeling. I begged them to give me something to knock me out, but they wouldn't.
Then I was wheeled to my room only to have the orthopedic surgeon come in and say that he wanted better Xrays. REALLY??!?!!
So I was wheeled back. I begged and cried for them not to do this again because the pain was God awful. I KNEW from the time that I fell that I broke my leg.
A nurse said "I know" after I cried that it hurt to move how they wanted me to for the xray. I snapped "No, you don't know. Unless you've had this happen to you, you don't know!"

A few minutes later, I heard the surgeon in the hallway say "She broke her femur."
I started crying. I came to this larger city to get a new start and now THIS!?!?!?!?
It was told to me that I'd completely destroyed the top of my femur that goes into the hip. So I had to have surgery around 3:30 or 4 to have a rod put inside my femur that went to my knee along with a long nail and pins.

I came home on the third day, which was a huge mistake. I didn't have what I needed here. No bed for me to lay down and get up in. I slept on a rocker recliner, and I got stuck on it. It was so low to the ground that I hurt myself and exhausted myself. I went into the hospital again that morning. I was in there for five more days.

It was horrible. I became so depressed I begged God to let me die. I even became suicidal. I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel.

But now? It's been four weeks and three days since my accident/surgery, and I can see that light. I'm walking more and more. Putting more and more weight on my leg. I'm becoming more independent again. Which feels so good.

I am hoping by November 1st I won't need the walker or anything to help me walk.

I'm just taking it one day at a time.

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