A reflection on 2007
Sunday, January 06, 2008
Wow is this year already over, are we really in 2008? 2008 gosh I feel old, LOL! So I decided I wanted to write a few lines about last year so that I can focus and work on this coming year. This is the first year in my life that I can actually feel good about doing something positive for myself. It's not like any other new year where it was despressing to even look back because all I had done was work, work, work. Well obviously I've had good times, like when I met my husband, had my two kids and got married. A lot has happened since 2003 for me. Last year I felt like it was time to stop living in the "what ifs". I was going to turn 25 in July 07 and although for a lot a people that is young for me it was a turning point. I had a mini mid life crisis or should I say I'm still having one, LOL! I had many instances in 2005 where I started to really notice that I needed to do something about my weight. Once I even spent four hours looking for an outfit to go out to come back home with NOTHING! I loathed going shopping. Although I LOVE SHOPPING, LOL! I hated going into the dressing rooms and coming out with maybe one thing or nothing when I had gone in there with twenty articles of clothing. I tried to to tell myself that it was okay, that I loved myself fat. I told myself once that this was my genetics and that I couldn't do anything to help it. That was the time I got rid of all of my "skinny" clothes. So at the end of March a mircle happened, LOL! A miricle for me anyway. My husband said to me have you heard of Sparkpeople, and I said no, why would I know about this website. So he told me about it. I immediatley felt excited and the next day I came to visit and it's all history from there. It all seemed to fit together and with the help of my sitter ( I love you) she allowed me to leave my kids an extra hour with her after work so that I could work out. So I started working out and I started tracking my food about a month and a half later and little by little the weight came off. I started to lose about 10 lbs a month and feeling so much better about myself. I just kept at it and kept at it. Then in August I had lost 40 lbs with just cardio. So I decided that I needed to integrate strength training into my routine. So since August I started with a program my friends trainer started her with and I've been following it ever since. I closed 2007 with a weight loss of 70 pounds! Wow my life has changed tons! I can wear smaller clothes and cuter clothes. I even had a lady call me medium size last night when for so long I know I was looked at as big. I have had to deal with temptations and laziness. To some I succame and to some I resisted. I still struggle now. It has not been easy but my will to succeed is far more greater than my will to quit. It takes a lot to say "I'm staying in the race even if I crawl to the finish line. I want this to be my biggest triumph. I want to finally say that I set a goal and actually met it! Watch out Sparkpeople this is my year to finally do it. I can't wait to see myself in a size 12! I have gained so much from this experience. I'm greatful that I gained all of that weight because now that I have worked soooo hard to take it off, I have a greater appreciation for me and for all of those women that get up everyday to work out when they don't want to, drink a diet pepsi or water when all they really want to have is chocolate cake. If I can take only one thing out of this experience is that I will never, EVER call myself fat again. I love my body just the shape it is. I will no longer be ashamed. So to all of you out there just starting your journey or have been on it for a while, don't give in. Your day will come soon! Keep up the battle!