Saturday, January 19, 2008
One of the problems I have with making friends is that I relate better to mixed up people then to well balanced people, probably because I am mixed up. If they are "normal" they aren't as interesting. I am extremely shy (verging on the phobic) so when someone starts noticing me, I immediately run the other way. On top of that I have no self esteem, I don't see how anyone would want to be my friend, so if someone tries to make friends with me, that is the last thing that would occur to me. I haven't had someone try to become my friend since I was twelve. I either fell into the friendships, or actively pursued the friendships that I've had since then. It doesn't help that I am somewhat isolated, I don't spend a lot of time with people my own age. I work in the kitchen of a family owned drive in restaurant, so I don't see a lot of new people. I also spend a lot of my free time with my elderly landlords, I see more of them then anyone else.