ILOVEROSES
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ILOVEROSES's Blogs

A young boy enters a barber shop.
Monday, October 26, 2020      24 comments

A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer: “This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.” The barber puts a dollar coin in one hand and two 20 cent pieces in the other, then calls the b... Read more
Lie detecting robot.
Sunday, October 25, 2020      25 comments

John was a salesman’s delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick. His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change. One day John came home with another one of his unusual purchases. It was a robot that John claimed was ... Read more
A man is stopped by a police officer.
Friday, October 23, 2020      22 comments

A man who is driving is stopped by a police officer. The man says: “What’s the problem, officer?” The officer says: “You were going at least 75km/h in a 55km/h zone.” “No sir, I was going 65.” The man’s wife leans over and says: “O... Read more
The Note.
Thursday, October 22, 2020      23 comments

A woman, cranky because her husband was late coming home again, decided to leave a note, saying, "I've had enough and have left you...don't bother coming after me”. Then she hid under the bed to see his reaction. After a short while, t... Read more
A man walks into a bookstore.
Wednesday, October 21, 2020      25 comments

A man walks into a bookstore. He walks around and sees a notebook behind a counter that’s locked in a glass box. He asks the cashier what book it is and the cashier says he’d need to get confirmation from the manager. The man asks him to do... Read more
A school teacher sent her student home with a note
Monday, October 19, 2020      27 comments

One day a school teacher sent her student home with a note for his mother. The note read: “Your son is an obedient and bright student, but spends too much time talking to girls.” The next day the student returned with a note from his m... Read more
It was the mailman’s last day on the job.
Sunday, October 18, 2020      31 comments

It was the mailman’s last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighbourhood. When he arrived at the first house on his route, he was greeted by the whole family who congratulated him and se... Read more
An unhappy couple decided to go to a therapist.
Friday, October 16, 2020      25 comments

After 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife went to counselling. When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the years they had been married. The complaints mentioned neglect, l... Read more
A man wanted to hit the perfect shot
Monday, October 12, 2020      24 comments

A man headed to the golf course with one goal in mind, to drive the ball out over the water into the small green on a tiny spit of land. Only the pros made that shot and he was determined to put himself in that category. He tried the shot h... Read more
A group of kindergartners were learning new words.
Sunday, October 11, 2020      26 comments

A group of kindergartners were trying to become accustomed to the first grade. The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher insisted on no baby talk. “You need to use ‘big people’ words,” she’d always remind them. She asked Chris what... Read more
Butch the Rooster.
Friday, October 09, 2020      26 comments

Listen for those bells come Election time. Sarah was in the fertilized egg business. She had several hundred young pullets and ten roosters to fertilize the eggs. She kept records and any rooster not performing went into the soup pot an... Read more
Two nuns chatting.
Monday, October 05, 2020      19 comments

A nun is sitting with her Mother Superior chatting. “I used some horrible language this week and feel absolutely terrible about it.” “When did you use this awful language?” asks the Mother superior. “Well, I was golfing and hit an... Read more
Newlyweds wake up one morning.
Monday, October 05, 2020      32 comments

A newlywed couple wake up one morning on their honeymoon and the man suggests: “Darling, why don’t you brew us some coffee?” The wife looks confused and says: “But that’s your task, honey.” “What? Why?” “It’s all over the Bible, d... Read more
An English teacher asked her students a question.
Sunday, October 04, 2020      26 comments

An English teacher asked her class to write an essay on what they’d do if they had a million dollars. Alec handed in a blank sheet of paper. “Alec!” yelled the teacher, “You’ve done nothing. Why?” “Because if I had a million dollars, ... Read more
A woman and her husband go to the dentist's office.
Saturday, October 03, 2020      26 comments

A woman and her husband stop at a dentist’s office. “I need a tooth pulled right away,” she says. “Don’t bother with the pain relief; we’re in a hurry.” “Which tooth do you want pulled?” asks the dentist. The woman shoves her husb... Read more

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